THE CICAK.com

The Asian man’s dilemma

By CHAN SHIJUN

A few months ago, I came across a debate about Asian men losing out to their Western counterparts - or more specifically, Caucasian men - in attracting Asian women. This apparent phenomenon appeared on the Malaysian Project Petaling Street blogroll.

I understand that many of you have absolutely no clue what I’m getting at.

What the heck is the Asian Man’s Dilemma, or AMD?

OK, so I made up the acronym.

AMD is the name, I’m giving, for this peculiar social phenomenon that’s happening around the world. Walk around cities such as Sydney, Melbourne, London, New York, and you will easily spot countless Caucasian guys walking hand in hand with Asian women. They outnumber Asian men-Caucasian women couples.

Why is this happening? I’ll give you my rojak theory on this subject.

From what I’ve read, apparently, Asian girls go ga-ga over white guys because of their physique. Yeap, bigger, taller, muscular and fairer men are better. We, Asian guys, just can’t compete genetically with Caucasian men, in terms of height and other physical attributes.

Asian men tend to be shorter, and have less body mass. That’s just how we’re made.

A girl mentioned on a blog that some Asian women preferred Caucasian features - sharp noses, blue eyes and blond hair - which Asian men sorely lacked. That’s two strikes against us.

Let’s move on to the third strike.

One word: Wealth, or the assumption that Western men are richer.

Because many Western countries are generally more developed than Asian countries, Asian men are assumed to be “poorer” and less financially secure, compared to white men.

Let’s turn the tables around. The attraction (to some extent) is mutual the other way round. Many Caucasian males prefer Asian girls. I think white men might feel this way because they perceive Asian women as passive and demure creatures.

Perhaps, they would like to exercise their masculinity - me Tarzan, you Jane - and find it harder to do so with outspoken Caucasian girls.

Lastly, some Asian women complain about their partners’ chauvinistic behavior.

Apparently, many Asian men do not view women as equals. Here are some of their views - men are intellectually superior to women (which I seriously doubt, seeing the ratio of men to women in universities), women belong in the kitchen, women shouldn’t be career-driven, and that they should be subservient to the “man of the house.”

So why is this phenomenon happening?

It all boils down to cultural exposure.

Western television programs and movies shape how we define “beauty” and “masculinity.” We are influenced by male heroes in Hollywood blockbuster films - they are often white, tall, have bulging biceps, 6-pack torsos, nice wavy blond hair and deep blue eyes.

Think Brad Pitt, Tom Cruise, Orlando Bloom, and you’ll get the picture. How many Asian male heroes have you seen in popular Western movies?

There are less beefcake-on-two-legs Arnold Swaz-something type of Asian men.

There are less problems in homogeneous close-knit societies in Japan and Korea. Unfortunately, Singaporeans, Malaysians, and other Asians are generally more exposed to western media and pop culture. And it has influenced our preference.

Asian male heroes in movies tend to be the Triad-affiliated-bad-boy type, which is totally fine with me. Give me a cool Triad kia over those steroid-pumped prehistoric men anytime.

But the common complaint that girls have, is that Asian men are chauvinistic - wanting trophy, docile, housekeeper wife or girlfriends. I agree with girls who make these statements.

After schooling with many Chinese-educated guys in high school, I can safely say that many of them want passive girlfriends.

With all respect, I say - bulls**t to that!

I totally believe in equality. In my opinion, these men are really out of touch with reality.

In conclusion, personal preference determines what is “hot,” “cute,” and “affluent.”

Things do change. And before you know it, new preferences and generalisations could revert how some women (and men) are selecting their partners.

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CHAN SHIJUN is a contributing writer for theCICAK.

Shijun is an accounting student in Sydney, Australia. He is fanatically opinionated about contemporary affairs and loves anything sci-fi. Visit his site.